Even the most cheerful and sociable guys admit that they are not able to communicate with girls freely. On an appointment with the nice woman become held down, cannot pick up an interesting subject, do not know in what manner to carry on a conversation. In this article the most practical advice which coaches and psychologists usually give are collected, and illustrated with real examples from life.
Psychology of communication with girls
Guys cannot correctly communicate to the pleasant girl because of two psychological barriers. The first is based that it is impossible to begin and support long a conversation (when you cannot be at loss for words, awkward silence hangs). Other situation opposite – the guy excessively chatters, but his subjects are obviously not interesting to the girl, irritate, offend it. Good the conversation will be at observance of three conditions:
- Pleasant emotions: a conversation it gives pleasure to both interlocutors.
- Ease: the conversation is interesting to partners and there is a wish to continue it.
- Absence of conflict: in the course of the conversation nobody has sense of shame, offenses.
In a case with a conversation with the girl at the first stages of acquaintance, the purpose of the guy is creation of a positive image. If it really is pleasant to him, then correctly built conversation on an appointment will be a guarantor that the girl to agree to communication continuation.
Fear of a conversation with the girl
The past of guys prevents to conduct dialogue. Problems arise for three reasons:
- Lack of sufficient practice of communication with girls (the inability to pick up the first phrase, to softly translate a subject, is beautiful to finish a conversation).
- The wrong mental sets (“usual subjects which carry away guys are not interesting to women”, “girls silly, are not able to speak on clever subjects”).
- Bitter experience of communication with girls in the past (for example, on some appointment the woman roughly derided the guy, as a result at communication with other ladies he began to be afraid of repetition of an unpleasant situation).
Responsible for an unsuccessful talk often are the overestimated expectations of the guy, his wrong opinion. For example, he can consider that he madly is pleasant to the woman, will be excessively frivolous. If the girl has no feelings to the man, just wishes to chat without intimate implication, then his hints, frank subjects and abundance of compliments will begin to confuse, irritate. You can practice chatting with online girls using free jasminlive cams very easy and effectively as they always have friendly girls online in quality webcam chat rooms. As old saying goes – practice makes things perfect so I recommend to try it out.
How to get the girl chatting if she ignores you
Girls are much more constraining than guys, on the first appointment are silent more often – it does not mean at all that they are meek creatures on life or soaring it are not pleasant to them. If you feel that the interlocutor reluctantly answers, at first try to change the subject (can, previous is unpleasant to it). If did not help and the girl continues to be silent, undertake a conversation and tell stories from life, share thoughts of movies, books. Recommend, before an appointment to make the plan of a conversation: to remember 3-4 lovely and amusing true-life stories, to outline 5-7 subjects. In a conversation do pauses, giving the chance to the woman to lead, begin to speak about itself.
How to correctly to interrupt a conversation
Do not interrupt an interesting conversation with phrases it seems “I went home, so far”. Such end of a conversation is tactless at any communication even if the conversation is not glued. The best option – to refer to late time, urgent matters (need to finish work, to take a walk with a dog). Surely at the end tell that the taken place conversation was incredibly pleasant, it is a pity to leave. Ideally – to agree about a new meeting on the near future.